I Haven't Had Orgasm Yet With My Husband

[Julia]

Hi, i just signed up with this forum and i have a question... I have never really talked to anybody else about this and i guess its about that time i did. The thing is i havent had orgasm yet, me and my husband got married a month ago and for a while now it had kinda been bothering him that i havent had my big O yet with him... for me personally it doesn't bother me that i havent had one and i told my husband that. But for some reason it bothers him like crazy because he cant make me have an orgasm hes even gone to the extent to where he is looking stuff up on the computer and trying to find out more about it. I dont know what else to do... If you have any advise it would help out a lot... thank you.

[Sammy]

So in summary... you are not bothered by the lack of orgasm... and your man is going crazy about it.

So based on that... I am assuming you are asking how you should handle HIM in this situation.

First of all... it is GREAT that he is looking stuff up online and that he really... really wants to sexually please you... this sounds like a big win to me!

He will know how to give you your first orgasm... which turns out to be way easier than either of you think), and you can both live happily ever after... yet there are two other issues here.

1) He may feel emasculated and insecure that he cannot give his woman an orgasm.

I am glad you never faked it with him... that adds a whole layer of feeling deceived that really messes with a man's emotions... to the extent that you can open a serious dialog about how much you love feeling him inside of you... and you can really demonstrate with your words and your body the deep truth of how much you enjoy sexually pleasing him... how much it moves you to see him have an orgasm when he is inside of you... to the extent that you can do that, you will experience truly understanding him... because that is exactly the feeling he wants... to enjoy that YOUR orgasm when he is inside of you... and when you "get" that... he will feel deeply understood.

This is a sweet intimacy builder for your entire relationship.

Plus, it gives you permission to stop trying to have an orgasm and to actually allow yourself to really tune into the wonder of arousing him and leading him into orgasm with your body... when you are focused on that pleasure... rather than trying so hard to figure out your pleasure... you might just surprise yourself by accidentally having your first orgasm.

2) The other side of the insecurity issue is his deep desire to be unique and special to you... to do something to you that no other lover has ever done.

There are not too many virgins left out there in the marriage pool... and when we find the special girl of our dreams... we men still like for some special difference that will set us apart.

For him... the fact that you have not had an orgasm yet is a huge OPPORTUNITY for him to be the first.

He secretly LOVES this idea... and his research all over the internet and his efforts are the modern analog of going out and fighting dragons for you... he wants to show you that he is the bravest knight of them all.

So when he comes back beaten down by that dragon and has not slain it yet... treat him accordingly... as the hero who has gone out to win something special for you... when you recognize him for his true... loving intentions... it will melt his insecurities and make him feel seen... received... and appreciated for the man he wants to be in your life.

[Michael]

It is not only women who scream in bed. In fact, contrary to common belief men actually scream quite a bit in bed. That is when they are truly enjoying the sex. If you want to know if your man is having mind-blowing sex, then pay attention to whether he screams when you are having sex.

Make sure you are satisfying your man in bed if you want to keep him. Otherwise, he will go looking for great sex elsewhere. It amazes how many women underestimate how important good sex is to men and how vital it is to having a strong and lasting relationship. It also puzzles me that so many women I come across have no idea how to please a man in the bedroom.

You better get it right when it comes to sex. I'm going to help you do that.

Listed below are three powerful tips on how to make your man scream in the bedroom with joy:

1. Dance Around When You Are Having Sexual Intercourse: Yes you heard me right, I want you to dance around when his penis is inside you. When are on top you should be moving up and down and to the side. This will excite him big time! When your butt is to his face, you should also be moving around. Men get very bored if a women just stays still during sex.
2. Give Him A Blow Job: It amazes me how many women avoid giving a man a blow job during sex. You have to realise that men love blow jobs! In fact, some surveys show that some men prefer blow jobs to sex. So if you want your man to really love the sex, you should be sucking his penis!
3. Tell Him To Ejaculate On You: Many men will not admit it but have a secret fantasy to ejaculate on women. However, many of them are too shy to bring it up or do it. If you really want to please your man in the bedroom, then tell him to ejaculate on you. He will be over the moon!

[Sofia]

Every woman wants to be respected and loved by the man that she loves. This is a natural human wish. To want beyond that, to want a man to desperately seek for a sexual encounter with you is a higher wish that a few yearn for; if you're one of these women, here are a few tips that would make you the most smoldering hot woman for him:

Lovingly say his name.
The sweetest name that you could ever call him is his very own name. Studies have proven that more than honey, sweetheart, darling or sugar pie, a person is more stimulated when he hears that very name that he's born with. So just call him Gary rather than love.

A little mystery should have him salivate.
Men are always eager to hunt and find out and investigate. They are more intrigued in a woman who knows how to have a little mystery about her rather than someone who goes about and tells everyone about her whole life story on the first meeting.

Wear something fetching.
Don't ever meet up with him unless you're properly dressed and you have all the right accessories to complete the ensemble. If you visually please the guy, you have a greater chance of going to bed with him eventually.

Flaunt all of your best assets.
If you've got enviable hips, then sway them as he walks behind you. If you've got tantalizing eyes, flicker your lashes as he passes by. Wear a low-cut blouse and see how he'd respond!

Show that you have less inhibitions now.
Maybe he's used to seeing you as the shy woman who talks a little softly. You can entice the guy to have sex with you once he sees a little change in you. Be a little more aggressive. Brush your skin against his and wink at him as you do it! This should be a real shocker for him but he'd definitely love it!

Build his anticipation.
Tease him with sexy phone calls and text messages. You can also email your sexiest (or nude!) photographs. Let him ogle at your voluptuous body that's there for his private enjoyment. Let his desire build up and you'll surely reap the sweet rewards later on.

Get as close to him as possible.
Work on getting closer with the guy. Work also on your flirting moves, to the point of being an expert at them. Let him want to make love to you as he feels the electrifying sensation of your skin against his.

[Julia]

Hi everyone,

Thank you for your advice!