How to stop overthinking

[noice99]

Hi, I really need an advice because it’s been bugging me a lot lately.
Long story short, my boyfriend and I have been seeing each other for 4-5 months now. We met online and clicked right away, which made our ‘relationship’ go at a faster pace than any ‘normal’ relationship. This scared him at the beginning, as he never had a serious relationship and was scared of commitment. He always made sure to communicate with me, though, telling me about his fears and doubts about our relationship. It was really hard at the beginning because he would often distance himself or just go cold all of a sudden...but I really liked him so I still still stayed even when he expressed his doubts.
Then, one day, all of a sudden, he decided to end our relationship. He told me that he felt like he was wasting my time by giving me false hope when he knew that he might never be ready to commit. It hurt, but I accepted his choice and decided to cut him off.
It didn’t take him long (2 days) before getting back to me and asking me for a second chance. He told me he was just really scared and he was overthinking, but then he realized how strong his feelings for me were. He chased me for a week before I finally gave in and accepted to take him back. He was showing me another side of him that he has never shown before, he was more romantic, more affectionate, and I can finally see how much he really likes me.
The problem is that, I am VERY insecure now. I am always afraid that he is going to leave me again - even if he keeps reassuring me. I cannot stop overthinking and I always feel like I have an extra pressure now to keep him happy and it is just really hard on me. We are super happy, we have a great time and I can see how much he cherishes me, but I cannot help but have a little voice at the back of my head who tells me ‘he’s going to leave you, don’t be too happy’. So, my question would be: how do I stop overthinking? How do I trust him? I have already expressed my fears to him and he has already reassured me but I do not know how to stop my mind fron going crazy.
Thank you so much guys.

[Roy]

The only way to stop overthinking is to trust his words. You must realize that there is always something to lose in any relationship, so don't be afraid of him breaking up with you again. Trust him and even if it happens, then so be it.

[Sandra]

Majority of break-ups are due to unresolved trust issues in relationships. Trust plus love and respect equals a successful relationship.

Every person yearns to have a happy and successful married life. However, statistics shows that almost 50% of relationships in the US are dissolved because of various reasons. Trust issues in relationships are one of the problems.

Every individual has a certain degree of having difficulty in trusting somebody. You can't blame yourself or anybody else for saying, "I don't easily trust someone." That's normal but if a person says, "I don't trust anybody!" That is a big problem.

If you are in a romantic relationship and you notice that your girlfriend or boyfriend has a hard time trusting the people around him or her; that is a clear indication that he or she has trust issues in relationships.

Trust is very important in any relationship. It holds the partners together to form a commitment. If your girlfriend or boyfriend doesn't know how to trust, your relationship will always be at stake because doubt is in the way.

A person who relationship trust issues is trapped and he or she worries all the time; constantly checking on you, asking the details of your activities and whereabouts. At first it's okay because you think he or she is concern and sweet. But in the long run it will be annoying and you feel mistrusted.

To avoid the possible damage in your relationship, you need to find out the reason behind your girlfriend or boyfriend's mistrusting attitude. Perhaps the mistrust rooted in his childhood or former relationships wherein he was betrayed.

Here are the following steps you can do to help your boyfriend overcome his insecurities and trust issues.

- Talk heart to heart with your boyfriend, explain how you feel and emphasize the importance of trust in your relationship.

- Tell your boyfriend that you want to build a strong relationship and it can only be done if you have faith with each other.

- You must admit that his or her trust issues in relationships bother you and it may cause a big problem. Before it happens you want to prevent it.

- Convince your boyfriend to share his personal fears with you and pinpoint the cause of mistrust. Jot down every issue.

- Identify every issue that really bothers you and discuss why and how it is affecting your relationship.

- For instance: He wants to know your activities and whereabouts.

- Problem: Monitoring is too much, you feel like a child and mistrusted without probable reason.

- Solution: Will inform him about your daily activities and will try your best to call twice a day whenever possible.

- Make sure that both of you agree to every solution and comfortable with it.

- Express your commitment with each other to build a more intimate and stronger relationship by completely trusting each other.

Trust issues in relationships normally arise when one or both partners went through a bad relationship in the past, thereby carrying the baggage with them in their new relationship. The past affects the person's ability to completely trust anyone including the person whom he or she is intimately involved with.

Lack of trust destroys any relationship, no matter how you love the person. Most of the time people who have trust issues in relationships are super jealous, insecure, and controlling. Why? Because of fear that the person he or she loves will cheat on him or her.

If you can't trust the person you love, you can't have a good relationship. You will never be happy because your worries and fears are haunting you. The best thing for you to do is to forget the memories of a bad relationship and start fresh.

People are not the same and every person has a different intention in a relationship. If your intention is good and if you want to love and be loved there's nothing to worry.

All you have to do is to be honest with your girlfriend or boyfriend. If you have trust issues in relationships don't be afraid to discuss it as early as possible in your dating period. This will give you peace of mind and you will feel more secure in your relationship.