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My boyfriend of several years has had a history of not being fully transparent about his finances. Since he wants to live with me and really wants to marry me his financial issues are a concern of mine. We broke up numerous times (I have broken up with him)because he was not truthful about how much money he owed and some more things dealing with his finances.
We recently reconciled because he told me he has fully changed and now he was completely fine and financially responsible. He paid all his bills on time and he did not overcharge any of his cards. However, I have come to learn that he spent a good chunk of money on s complete new wardrobe and some golf related items which cost several hundreds of dollars. He ended up paying this with and a modest of inheritance. I should be noted that he has no money saved for retirement and he already is just turned 66.
What’s more troubling is that he used his elderly mother‘s credit card recently. I asked him this weekend how much she has on that credit card since he’s explaining to me he is going to her on Medicaid in the near future. He did not fully disclose the real amount she owes and also lied about the monthly payments he made on the card. In reality, she owes more than what he told me and the monthly payments of much greater that he told me. I think he was thinking that if the balance was the amount he told me that the monthly payments would have to be less and they really are. I know for a fact that you have to pay at least 1% of the balance as a minimum plus the current interest to keep the card in good standing. Using his figures that would be three times the amount he said he pays. He uses his mothers funds to pay the bill which would include the item that he purchased this month that is a magazine.
He also told me he did not use one of his credit cards anymore but I know for a fact that he recently used it about six weeks ago. Whileone of these lies do not in themselves t justify a break up it is the same pattern but I have been dealing with for many years.
We really love each other and have a lot of chemistry. I can’t imagine why he can’t be truthful about his money issues with me? If this is the case, but I can also imagine how possibly supposed to build a future with him considering I will be retiring in the next 3 to 5 years and I have a I have enough in retirement to enjoy it decently as a partner who is financially responsible. appreciate your thoughts.
We recently reconciled because he told me he has fully changed and now he was completely fine and financially responsible. He paid all his bills on time and he did not overcharge any of his cards. However, I have come to learn that he spent a good chunk of money on s complete new wardrobe and some golf related items which cost several hundreds of dollars. He ended up paying this with and a modest of inheritance. I should be noted that he has no money saved for retirement and he already is just turned 66.
What’s more troubling is that he used his elderly mother‘s credit card recently. I asked him this weekend how much she has on that credit card since he’s explaining to me he is going to her on Medicaid in the near future. He did not fully disclose the real amount she owes and also lied about the monthly payments he made on the card. In reality, she owes more than what he told me and the monthly payments of much greater that he told me. I think he was thinking that if the balance was the amount he told me that the monthly payments would have to be less and they really are. I know for a fact that you have to pay at least 1% of the balance as a minimum plus the current interest to keep the card in good standing. Using his figures that would be three times the amount he said he pays. He uses his mothers funds to pay the bill which would include the item that he purchased this month that is a magazine.
He also told me he did not use one of his credit cards anymore but I know for a fact that he recently used it about six weeks ago. Whileone of these lies do not in themselves t justify a break up it is the same pattern but I have been dealing with for many years.
We really love each other and have a lot of chemistry. I can’t imagine why he can’t be truthful about his money issues with me? If this is the case, but I can also imagine how possibly supposed to build a future with him considering I will be retiring in the next 3 to 5 years and I have a I have enough in retirement to enjoy it decently as a partner who is financially responsible. appreciate your thoughts.
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