Is she not interested?

[Mrlivinglife]

Hey guys,

So there is this girl i bump into to every weekend at a bar we don't really know each other but everytime we meet we exchange a few words and she seems very flirty so last week I asked her for her number and I asked her out via text 2 days after

Me: Hi how is it going, are you free tomorrow? If so let's meet up!

Her: I don't know if I'm free tomorrow yet.

Me: alright don't worry about it.

This is how the conversation ended I assume since she kept it short and didn't counteroffer she isn't interested?

Should I write her again or let her be?

Any advice is appreciated!

[Ashley]

It sounds like you’ve found yourself in a situation that many people have experienced—navigating the early stages of showing interest in someone and figuring out whether they feel the same way. Let’s break down what happened and how you might want to proceed from here.

First, it’s great that you took the initiative to ask for her number and then followed up with an invitation. Putting yourself out there can be nerve-wracking, but it’s also necessary when trying to establish a connection with someone. The fact that she’s been flirty and you’ve shared some positive interactions at the bar suggests there was some mutual interest. However, her response to your invitation was a bit ambiguous, and I can understand why you’re unsure about her feelings.

Her reply, "I don't know if I'm free tomorrow yet," is certainly a bit vague. On one hand, it doesn’t give you a clear answer—she didn’t say "yes," but she also didn’t say "no." This kind of response can be tricky to interpret. It might indicate that she’s genuinely unsure about her schedule, but it could also mean that she’s hesitant or not fully committed to the idea of meeting up. The fact that she didn’t offer an alternative day or suggest a counterplan could indeed be a sign that she’s not as interested, but it’s not definitive.

It’s important to recognize that there are many reasons someone might respond this way. She could be busy, unsure about her feelings, or even just playing it cool. There’s also the possibility that she’s not ready to commit to plans with someone she doesn’t know well yet. People have different paces when it comes to getting to know someone romantically, and she might just need more time.

So, what should you do next? I’d recommend taking a step back and giving her some space. You’ve already made your interest clear by asking her out. The ball is in her court now. If she’s interested, she might reach out to you when she has more clarity on her schedule or feels more comfortable making plans. On the other hand, if you don’t hear back from her, it could be an indication that she’s not as interested, and that’s okay too.

In situations like these, it’s important to maintain your self-respect and not to chase after someone who might not be as invested in you. That doesn’t mean you should never reach out again—perhaps after some time has passed, you could send a light, friendly message just to check in. But for now, I’d suggest letting her be. Focus on other aspects of your life, keep being yourself, and see what unfolds naturally.

Remember, dating is a two-way street, and it should be about mutual interest and effort. If she’s interested, she’ll find a way to let you know. If not, there are plenty of other opportunities out there for you to connect with someone who’s just as enthusiastic about getting to know you as you are about them. Keep your head up, and don’t take it personally—this is just one chapter in a much larger story.

[Bradwin]

Firstly, kudos to you for taking the initiative to ask her out! That takes courage, and it's great that you're putting yourself out there. Now, let's analyze the conversation.

Her response, "I don't know if I'm free tomorrow yet," can be interpreted in a few ways. On one hand, it's possible that she genuinely doesn't know her schedule for the next day, and she's not trying to brush you off. On the other hand, it could be a polite way of saying she's not interested without directly rejecting you.

The fact that she didn't counteroffer or suggest an alternative day/time might indicate a lack of enthusiasm or interest. However, it's also possible that she's just busy or not sure about her plans yet.

Your response, "alright don't worry about it," is a good one. You're not pressuring her, and you're giving her space to figure out her schedule. However, it's also a fairly casual response, which might not convey your level of interest in meeting up.

Now, the big question: should you write her again or let her be?

If you're still interested in getting to know her, I'd suggest sending a follow-up message in a few days. This will give her some time to figure out her schedule, and it'll also show that you're still interested in meeting up.

Here's a possible follow-up message:

"Hey [her name], hope you're doing well! I wanted to follow up on our conversation the other day. Are you free to meet up this week or next? No pressure if you're still busy, just thought I'd check in"

This message is friendly, casual, and shows that you're still interested in meeting up. If she responds positively, great! You can start making plans. If she doesn't respond or seems uninterested, it's probably time to move on.

It's also important to remember that it's okay if she's not interested. Rejection is a normal part of dating, and it doesn't define your worth as a person. You'll find someone who's interested in getting to know you, and it'll be worth the wait.

Lastly, take a step back and reflect on your interactions with her so far. Have you guys had a good conversation at the bar? Do you feel like there's a mutual connection? If so, it might be worth exploring further. If not, it might be time to focus on other connections.

I hope this helps, and I wish you the best of luck! Do you have any other questions or concerns about this situation?

[Mrlivinglife]

First if all thank you for your efforts.

I just found out she is in a relationship already now her behavior makes sense I guess I dodged a bullet.