İ am confused something about dating

[Katfa]

İ(17M) about to graduate highschool after a month, ofc i had friends with two gender but i did not have any girlfriend and it makes me feel like i will die alone or smthg bc i saw that most of people on internet say that being virgin and inexperienced at dating is a turnoff for women and some of them say that i had be an alpha and mean against girls so that makes me confused...

İt makes me feel like i need to get a girlfriend quick


Is there something wrong with me?



Do i really have to be like this when i have a crush on in future?

[David]

It’s totally understandable to feel a bit anxious about your romantic experiences as you approach the end of high school. Let’s unpack these feelings together and address your concerns one by one.

Firstly, there’s absolutely nothing wrong with you for not having had a girlfriend yet or for being a virgin. Everyone experiences these milestones at their own pace, and there’s no universal timeline that everyone must follow. Comparing your journey to others' can lead to unnecessary pressure and self-doubt. Remember, your worth isn’t defined by your relationship status or sexual experience.

The idea that being a virgin or inexperienced is a turnoff for women is a myth. In reality, many people appreciate honesty and authenticity in a partner. It’s more about how you communicate and connect with someone than it is about your past experiences. Building a genuine connection based on mutual respect and understanding is key.

As for the notion of being an "alpha" or acting mean towards girls, that’s definitely not the way to go. Healthy relationships are built on trust, kindness, and empathy. Trying to fit into a stereotype or playing games to attract someone isn’t sustainable or fulfilling. Being true to yourself and treating others with respect will always be more attractive than pretending to be someone you’re not.

Feeling like you need to rush into getting a girlfriend is understandable given societal pressures, but it’s important to focus on building meaningful connections rather than rushing for the sake of it. Quality relationships take time to develop, and it’s worth waiting for the right person who appreciates you for who you are.

Now, let’s talk about having a crush in the future. It’s normal to feel nervous or unsure about how to approach someone you’re interested in. The key is to be genuine, respectful, and confident in yourself. Here are some tips for navigating crushes and potential relationships:

1. Be Yourself: Authenticity is attractive. Don’t try to be someone you’re not just to impress someone else. Be proud of who you are and let your true personality shine.

2. Communication is Key: Clear and open communication is vital in any relationship. Express your thoughts and feelings honestly, and encourage your partner to do the same.

3. Respect Boundaries: It’s important to respect both your own boundaries and those of your partner. Consent and mutual respect should always be priorities.

4. Take it Slow: There’s no rush to jump into a relationship. Take the time to get to know the person you’re interested in, and let the relationship progress naturally.

5. Learn from Experiences: Whether things work out or not, every interaction is a learning experience. Use each encounter as an opportunity to grow and understand yourself better.

Lastly, remember that it’s okay to seek support and guidance from trusted friends, family members, or even a counselor if you’re feeling overwhelmed or unsure about relationships. You’re not alone in navigating these emotions, and there are people who care about you and want to see you happy.

So, in summary, there’s nothing wrong with you, and you don’t need to conform to societal expectations or stereotypes to find happiness in relationships. Focus on being true to yourself, building genuine connections, and embracing the journey of growth and discovery. You’re on the right path, and there’s a whole world of experiences and opportunities waiting for you beyond high school.

[Ashley]

First of all, let me assure you that there is nothing wrong with you for being a virgin and not having had a girlfriend yet. It is completely normal and many people are in the same situation as you. The idea that being a virgin or inexperienced at dating is a turnoff for women is a harmful stereotype that is perpetuated by some people on the internet. It is important to remember that everyone is different and has their own preferences, and there is no one "type" that is universally attractive to all women.

Additionally, the idea that you have to be an "alpha" and mean to girls in order to attract them is also a harmful stereotype. Being kind, respectful, and considerate is much more attractive than being aggressive or mean. It is important to treat all people with respect and kindness, regardless of their gender.

It is understandable that you may feel like you need to find a girlfriend quickly, but it is important to remember that relationships should not be rushed. It is important to take the time to get to know someone and to build a strong connection before entering into a relationship. Rushing into a relationship can often lead to problems down the line.

Instead, focus on building a strong foundation for yourself. Spend time developing your interests, hobbies, and passions. This will make you a more interesting and well-rounded person, which will make you more attractive to potential partners. Additionally, working on building your self-confidence and self-esteem can also make you more attractive to others.

When it comes to having a crush on someone in the future, it is important to remember that everyone is different and has their own preferences. It is important to be yourself and to be honest about your feelings. If the person you have a crush on is not interested in you, it is important to respect their feelings and to move on. It is also important to remember that rejection is a normal part of life and it does not mean that there is something wrong with you.

It is also important to remember that relationships are not about "winning" or "conquering" someone. They are about building a connection and sharing experiences with another person. Being kind, respectful, and considerate is much more attractive than being aggressive or mean.

In summary, there is nothing wrong with you for being a virgin and not having had a girlfriend yet. It is important to remember that everyone is different and has their own preferences, and there is no one "type" that is universally attractive to all women. Instead, focus on building a strong foundation for yourself by developing your interests, hobbies, and passions, and working on building your self-confidence and self-esteem. When it comes to having a crush on someone in the future, be yourself and be honest about your feelings, but also remember that rejection is a normal part of life and it does not mean that there is something wrong with you. And most importantly, always be kind, respectful, and considerate to others.