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I Am Now 30 Days into Divorce and I Can't Save My Marriage

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MillionaireMatch

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  • I Am Now 30 Days into Divorce and I Can't Save My Marriage

    Sadly, I am now 30 days into divorce. Our 10 years Anniversary would have been next week. I can't save/fix this if the other person (my wife, soon to be my ex) doesn't want to save or fix it. I fell causality to the all too common case of "irreconcilable differences", also know as No Fault. I have chosen to take the highest of high roads during this process. We are still living together under the same roof and we have two small children. We have a fundamental and complete difference of opinion as to why our marriage has disolved. Every day is tough and sad but my conscience is clear. I did not end this marriage and she did. I'm learning to take it hour by hour, day by day. I chose to remember the good and great times as opposed to festering and allow myself to get bogged down in petty squabbles or thoughts of mistrust or resentment. For thst, I am stronger and will keep my chin up and persevere, not just for me, but especially for my children.

  • #2
    We would have been celebrating our 21st wedding anniversary this month. Instead 2 day before that we got divorced. I did everything I could possibly do to make this marraige work for the family sake, even though she was having an affair, her heart was gone and me staying in our family home for 1 year made it worse made it. For your own sanitary hold on to your faith and your values because at the end of your journey you will come out of this blessed. You will be able to help others because of your journey and be blessed because of it. Thank you for sharing your story. You are a great example to people like me.

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    • #3
      Do you find yourself saying to yourself, "my wife wants a divorce and I want to reconcile?"

      If your wife has decided that she wants a divorce, but you still feel fulfilled in your marriage, then you shouldn't throw in the towel and give up. That's if you think it's worth saving and fighting for.

      #1. Control your emotions - It's a good idea not to get emotional after finding out she wants a divorce. I know how hard this may be because you love her, but this will only push her further away.

      If you react by yelling or pleading with her, she will only feel even more convinced that ending the marriage is the right thing to do. Instead, respect her feelings and let her know that you understand how she feels and you just need some time to think things through.

      A lot of times when a couple breaks up or separates, the one who wanted to break will realize that it was a mistake to call it quits or split up.

      #2. Stay calm and be supportive - If your wife has made up her mind about separating, you should try your best to be supportive, because if you don't react, she will begin to wonder how you feel about the marriage, which is what you want.

      Another thing is that your wife will never know how a divorce will affect her life unless she is separated from you for a while. When she knows how hard life would be without you there by her side, it's a good chance she will not go through with the divorce.

      This may sound strange, but sometimes the threat of a divorce is what a marriage needs for both partners to step up to the plate and start working hard on making the marriage work.

      If you approach your wife the right way, soon you won't be thinking, "my wife wants a divorce and I want to reconcile. But these are just the first steps to making your marriage work.

      WARNING: Most vital tip of all - If you want to win your ex back in less than one month, you need some effective tips that has worked for thousands of people from around the world.


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      • #4
        When you are faced with knowing "My wife wants a divorce and I don't," it can seem like an impossible situation. Maybe you knew that something was wrong with your marriage but you thought you could work through it. Or maybe you were afraid your wife was having an affair but you didn't want to confront her about it. Or maybe you didn't even think you were having marriage problems and one day your wife told you she was leaving. Whatever your situation, there are a few key points you need to consider when it comes to stopping your divorce and getting your wife to change her mind.

        1. Don't follow your first instinct. Stopping your divorce doesn't have to be difficult, but you will make it harder on yourself if you try to convince your wife to stay before she's ready. So don't jump into immediately begging, pleading, or even trying to force her to stay with you. This will only push her further away.

        2. Give your wife some space. If your situation is "My wife wants a divorce and I don't," she might have even told you she needed space and time to think about your marriage and whether she wants a separation. Give it to her. If you can spend a week or two apart, that will be even better. But if your situation calls for the two of you to remain living together, then try to give her as much emotional and physical distance as possible. This will show her that you are taking her seriously. It will also give her a glimpse of what life will be like without you.

        3. Write your wife a letter. Keep it as short and to the point as possible. Again, don't resort to begging and pleading with her to try and change her mind about the divorce. Instead, agree with her. You don't have to agree with her about the divorce, but agree with how bad the situation has gotten. Try to really understand her side of the situation. This will go a long way towards changing her mind and helping her feel like you are really listening. It might even be enough to flip the cards in your favor so that she will consider working things out.

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