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How To Make Her Want To Kiss Me?



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  • How To Make Her Want To Kiss Me?

    The other day I took this girl out who is from Laos. Really cool (and cheeky) chick.

    Anyway as the date was going on I felt it time to kiss her, I leaned in and as I got close she pulled back. She then tells me that they don't kiss is Laos. Hmm...

    So I asked her how dating is in Laos. She said there is hand holding and things like that. So I put my arm around her and said ok, if it gets uncomfortable tell me.

    The rest of the date was fine, we both had fun, I was holding her hand as we walked, and arm around her when we were seated or standing at the traffic lights waiting to cross the road, but with no complaints.

    I want to know how can I be in a situation where she would want to kiss me? I totally want to respect her customs, but here in Australia, we kiss.

    Also is this some kind of test? Do you think sex would be also taboo for her?

    If you could shed some light on this it would be awesome.

  • #2
    OK Barry, this is an excellent topic you've brought up.

    And before we dive in, I want to commend you for listening to her and respecting her views.

    You've done a great job of combining indication of affection toward her with clear communication of your intent to help her feel safe and comfortable with you.

    Great job!

    I've definitely seen women cite cultural customs as excuses.

    Then again, I've also known plenty of women who meant it.

    I happen to know that there is indeed a strict ban on public display of affection in Laos, and that kissing someone in public there is nothing short of offensive to the masses.

    It wouldn't hurt to study up on Lao culture and see if you discover any further info, especially as it relates to what might happen in private rather than in public.

    But that's really just for your own well being.

    It doesn't matter one bit whether they kiss early on in relationships in Laos or not. That is, unless they don't kiss at all or something, and you can't deal with that indefinitely.

    Here's what I mean.

    The woman clearly likes you. So there are two key things to remember, both of them centered around getting YOU out of your own head:

    1) Not all women have flimsy world views/moral structures that they are easily willing to compromise.

    If a woman has set standards for herself, you simply can't take it personally when she actually (go figure) lives up to them.

    Further, if you respect her standards and customs as you mentioned, you likewise cannot spend any time trying to figure out how to circumvent them. That would not be in her best interest, and at that point you'd become an aggressor in this relationship.

    Remember...if a woman is not comfortable with you, you're toast.

    And if she thinks at all that your only interest is in getting her to compromise her morality, then she's not going to stick around for very long.

    2) The whole idea of women "testing" men as generally defined elsewhere is somewhat overblown.

    Women protect themselves from potential manipulators when they feel they should, whether that threat is real or not.

    If she perceives such a threat, the defense mechanism will go up.

    But meanwhile, a woman who likes you, feels comfortable around you and acknowledges your masculinity doesn't sense the need to drive you away, unless she has an unhealthy fear of success that haunts her.

    As such, what looks outwardly like a confrontational "test" of some sort may actually be nothing more than a subtle invitation to respond in a way a man would: by making a decision that shows personal strength, a willingness to act in her best interest and lack of neediness and/or desperation.

    In other words, the breathtaking truth is that most "testing" women do is really about igniting our masculinity so they can feel more sexually attracted to us.

    Importantly, that playful mindset can and will happen regardless of a woman's moral/ethical stance on actually acting on her sexual feelings.

    If you can be a man who is NOT sex-focused, and can enjoy her company --maybe excluding the hand holding and such for the time being--then you'll build the all-important feeling of security in her in no time.

    Then you simply ignite her femininity, as a masculine man should.

    No pressure...just security, a plan of action at all times for the dates you go on, calm laid-back motions and no overreactions.

    Enjoy her feminine presence, and allow her the freedom to enjoy your masculine presence in response. From there great things happen.

    If her words about not kissing in Laos were an overstatement in the general sense (i.e. not just as far as PDA goes), you'll know the extent of that soon enough under such circumstances.

    Remember, it's not always about something you did "wrong". And the most "right" thing you can do is build her comfort level and trust...but it has to be the real thing.

    From there, you'll get responses from women that will blow your mind.


    • #3
      I sincerely appreciate your answer.