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Hello, Merry Christmas and I hope you can help



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  • Hello, Merry Christmas and I hope you can help

    Hello all!!!

    I have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for just coming up to a year. Everything runs pretty smoothly, however there is one thing that we have argued about and that is her male best friend.

    A few years ago in told her that he had feelings for her, which doesnt help. Also being a man, I also know what they are like.

    I dont have issue with their friendship and I dont have any trust issues concerning my girlfriend.

    My main issue is the way he acts around my girlfriend and what he says to her:

    Some of the things he has said or done:
    - I was with a girl last night and we had to stop having sex as I was too big for her.
    - About his fancy dress costume which consisted of hotpants 'Its going to be embarrasing as people will be able to see everything and will stare because it is so big.' I have seen him in hot pants and there is nothing to see
    - Overly touchy.
    - My favourite text he sent her 'you would be proud of me, a girl wanted to meet me for sex from tinder and I didnt'

    I do not know any man that would say these things to his male friends.

    I find the way that he speaks to her entirely inappropriate and he regularly crosses a line. She says that she knows that he is a dick, and doesnt think anything of it because that is the way that he is. Me and him are 2 very different people and even though roughly the same age we are at very different stages of our life.

    The last time that he said something I reacted physically and ended up shaking. But I dont know whether or not I am being overly sensitive. She has even admitted that some of the things that she says to him is inappropriate.

    I think that I am rambling.


  • #2
    I also don't like male friends around a girl I'm in a relationship with. The reason being that such male friends can be a threat to your relationship. More often than not, they usually have feelings for your girlfriend. So, I will advice you do everything possible to make that guy stay away from your girlfriends. However, don't do it violently.


    • #3
      Merry Christmas,

      I don't think you are overly sensitive, because the things he says to her are unusual. I will advice you don't give him chance to be friends with you, because he will gain too much access to your girlfriend if you do that. Simply keep your distance from him.


      • #4
        Hey, it sounds like her friend is inappropriate and you both know it. I feel like it's her responsibility to call him out when he's crossing lines. If I were in your situation I would calmly explain why it bothers you, which it seems like you've already done, and request that she doesn't accept and allow that kind of language between the two of them. It's disrespectful to your relationship and she shouldn't be okay with that.