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Can't tell is my boyfriend is cheating.

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  • Can't tell is my boyfriend is cheating.

    My name is Courtney. I'm 26 years old and I have a three year old son. My boyfriend and I have been dating since my son was 8 months old. Since then I've seen pictures in his Snapchat from three different females but every time I confront him, he says he let his friend use his phone or something along those lines. I really feel deep down that he's playing me and I do NOT want to stay with someone like that. I feel like there could be a 15% chance that he isn't cheating and he's telling the truth, but I don't know for sure. Please help!

  • #2
    While not all men are the same - there does tend to be a common thread of signs that your boyfriend is cheating that a you may be able to detect. It is important however to not jump to conclusions, but rather to take the time and patience to really ensure that this is the case. After all, you don't want to sour the what would otherwise have been a perfectly good relationship by making false accusations.

    So, what are these major signs that your boyfriend is cheating. Well, these would include:
    • A change of habits or his schedule - are dates been postponed or giving excuses of frequently working late?
    • When you are together, do you have the same rapport and fun as you used to - or is he now (unusually) quiet or distant?
    • Instead of calling, are emails and texts now the norm?
    • What about calls he receives while you are together? - does he need to get up to take the call privately or say the the caller that he can't speak now?
    • Is he going on 'business' trips more often these days?
    • Is he buying you gifts for no apparent reason?
    • What about behavior in the bedroom - has this changed?

    While not wanting to jump to conclusions, a woman however does need to rely on that special intuition which can sooner, rather than later, deduce that something is wrong and therefore begin to take steps to try to resolve any issues and hopefully rescue the relationship. Also, she needs to examine herself too, to see where she may have contributed to the erosion of the relationship. Is she doing all she can to make it work and reciprocating the effort being made by her boyfriend to sustain the relationship?

    Once evaluating the signs that your boyfriend is cheating, you should quite simply let you boyfriend know how you feels, why you have these thoughts and suspicions so that an honest and non-confrontational discussion can be had. It could well be that openness and honesty can put the relationship back on track.

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    • #3

      Now, before you go accusing your boyfriend of cheating you should think this through. If you do accuse him of cheating without some sort of proof it very well may cause him to be more careful about how he carries on his affair. While most men think that they're pretty slick and so careful about hiding their cheating you will find that most men make the same mistakes that can easily be detected and uncover a cheating boyfriend's activities.

      Calling - Does your boyfriend pick up the phone every time you call him or has he been returning your phone calls sometimes 5 minutes or so after you call? Did he used to pick up the phone when you used to call but now either it goes to voicemail immediately like his phone is turned off or after a few rings? This could be a sign that your boyfriend is cheating.

      It could be that he is with another woman and he doesn't want her to get upset if you were to call him. Either she doesn't know about you or, if she does know about you, it upsets her to think that she is with a guy that isn't being exclusive with her. Crazy, I know, but sometimes a guy will tell the other woman that you are a nut job and that he loves her and a phone call from you could make her angry or upset to be reminded of you.

      The Check-in - Does you boyfriend call you sometimes when you're out or when you're apart just to see where you are? Does he specifically ask you where you are? This could be a sign that your boyfriend is cheating. He could be calling just to make sure that he doesn't bump into you or see you somewhere that would be out of the ordinary.

      As slick as he might think that he's being, a cheating boyfriend often exhibits these paranoid traits. For him it may add an element of excitement to his affair and a sense of superiority when he successfully executes a rendezvous with the other woman. Of course, when you do finally catch him cheating and confront him with what you have found out he will first try to deny any wrong-doing and eventually show remorse and his ego will be crushed because he really isn't as smart as he thought he was.

      It is actually pretty easy to get undeniable proof that your boyfriend is cheating if you know where to look. His cell phone, cell phone records and his computer are full of evidence of his exploits. You just have to know where to look.

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