Girlfriend is on vacation with her ex

[aya91]

We've been together for about 5 months (I'm 26, she's 20), right after she broke up with her ex. She had planned to spend a week in his cabin this summer, along with two more friends. We talked a lot about it and our relationship is going very well in terms of communication. We have really good sex, see each other every few days and we have a lot of fun together despite the age disparity. She assured me that the past relationship hadn't been going well for a long time and she wasn't attracted to him anymore, but she had planned that week a long time ago and wanted to spend some time with her friends and far away from civilisation and stress. Fair enough. She'll supposedly be sleeping in a room of her own.

Right now my subjective male-judgment tells me that she is happy with me and isn't missing anything, and I trust her. At the same time, it's a somewhat big red flag and it makes me panic. No matter what she says, she used to be attracted to that guy, it was her first boyfriend and they spend 3 years together. I avoid expressing my jealousy, but sometimes it does eat me up on the inside.

Being jealous makes me feel like a controlling idiot, trusting her makes me feel like a fool who's being played.

How should I best deal with the situation?

[David]

Hello:

Don't allow your jealousy control you to the extent that you start controlling your girlfriend. This is because you'll lose her if you continue this way.

I understand that it's natural for a man to be jealous but we as men must learn to control our jealousy.

Well, as for you girlfriend being on vacation with her ex, that isn't ideal at all. However, the best way to handle issues like this is to calm down and let her know that you are unhappy with her going on vacation with her ex. When you do this, I believe she won't do that again. However, if she repeats that in the future, then you need to leave that girl.

[Olivia]

She'll supposedly be sleeping in a room of her own.

There is no need to get yourself worked up. Like she told you, she'll be sleeping in her own room. You should trust her words, there is no need for the jealousy.

[Caleb]

Hi,

Most times, it's good to listen to your instinct. If your instinct tells you that she is still into her ex, don't ignore your instinct.

My candid advice is that you don't invest too much of yourself into the relationship especially at this early stage of your relationship with her.

Moreover, you only started dating her 5 months ago; if she still have feelings for her ex, she can still go back to him. By then, you will be heart broken.

So, love her, respect her, care for her; but don't be too emotionally involved in the relationship. This is because anything can happen.

Best wishes!