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My crush is mad, what should I do

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  • My crush is mad, what should I do

    Hi all, I am having problems with my crush and would appreciate if anyone could help.

    We are in a long distance "semi-relationship" but he is due to come to my city to work soon (got a job and applying for visa). Recently I heard rumours that his new boss resigned so I told him about that, I thought he would wish to know whether the rumours are true or not (if it was true, he would have more time to make plans but of course I wished he would tell me those are fake news). He got very mad, I said if he had not heard anything from the HR then it is probably fake news and hope he is not too worried. Then he asked how can he not be worried and said I should have just held back and not said it. He is super mad. Is there anything I can do other than ignoring him? To be honest am I in the wrong? Thanks.

    Mandy

  • #2
    Just apologize to him since you were wrong. Telling him you are sorry, will make all the difference. However, you must be sincere and heartfelt when saying sorry.

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    • #3
      I seriously think he over-reacted. What you said isn't suppose to make him mad, maybe he has an underlying reason why he is so mad beside what you said.

      Anyways, just apologize for saying it and that's all. Apologize just once and not more than once. Don't continue apologizing because it's going to make you lose your self worth.

      Good luck.

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      • #4
        It's not easy saying you're sorry to a guy and hopefully, it won't be a frequent thing. However, it is necessary if you want your relationship to work.

        When it comes to how to apologize to a guy, there are some do's and don'ts you need to follow.

        · Don't bring up other issues

        There are times when we are guilty of this. When we are apologizing or confronting someone, we tend to bring up past complaints or wrongdoings of the other person. Sometimes, you end up reminding of that time that he did something wrong too. Problem is, it happened months ago and you let it past. It has nothing to do with your argument now and bring it up will only make it more difficult to fix the issue.

        · Don't make a big deal out of it

        Try not to overreact or make a big deal out of all of this. When you confront him, overreacting will only make him feel uncomfortable. Sometimes, men would treat it as nothing more than just a mistake but if you blow it out of proportion, then he would feel that the hurt is deeper or would result to more resentment.

        · Do agree with what he is saying

        When you paraphrase, it shows that you are listening to him. You agree with him that he's upset because of what you did and you understand that you were at fault here. It's a lot better than just nodding your head as he rants and pretending that you are listening.

        · Do plan what your approach should be

        Planning your approach would be a good idea. Don't just barge in and say the words because you may lack sincerity. If you map out what you're going to say beforehand then you will find the task easier to accomplish.

        · Don't beat around the bush

        Men prefer that you talk straight and in plain language. Try not to use a lot of metaphors or similes because this might only annoy him. Make sure that your apology is straight to the point and sincere.

        · Don't bring it up again

        When you've apologized and he's accepted it then just let it be. You will never really be happy in your relationship if you keep reopening the wound. Be grateful that he's accepted your apology and just let it go.

        · Do promise him that things will be better this time

        It's possible that making up would mean a hug or a kiss in the end but sometimes he needs more than the show of affection. Men often want to solve problems so it's possible that he wants to hear a plan. You need to convince him that things will be different from now on and that you saw his point of view.

        How to apologize to a guy? Just make sure that you are sincere and calm when you approach him. He would prefer if you be straight with him and just own up to your mistakes.

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        • #5
          Thanks all, it seems that you all agree that I should apologise. Actually I already did that lightly by saying "I chose to tell you what I heard because I thought you have already got the job and thought you would want to know, sorry it made you fee uncomfortable, hope you are not too worried and have a great day", it was actually after this thay he says "how can I not be worried, there are things you should just keep to yourself, blah blah blah".

          I guess I could just promise it wont happen again and leave it there whether he accepts that or not. Please do let me know if you have other views. Thanks.

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