How to get over my EX now that she's dating my friend

[samthomas98]

*If you could take the time to read all the context it will be so appreciated*


So me and my EX split up over a month ago. We was together for around a year and a half. Was an amazing relationship and she was also my first ever love I opened up to this girl and she did the same with me. It was one of those relationships where we was best friends and everything was just going great and she was happy. Towards the end of our relationship thins just weren't working out and we both became unhappy and never actually did anything to make these things right.

Anyway, she doesn't really have any boy friends because she's just a girly girly but she did occasionally get on with the one guy lets call him A. Anyway throughout our relationship she never saw anything in A, and we would go to college and she would see him and go to parties etc but there was never an inclination that she ever liked him whilst we were together. Anyway, when we broke up all of her friends were saying that the best way to get over me was to "get under someone else" as in start dating someone else. We'd only been split up a few weeks. What I can't understand is that multiple of her friends have done this when they ended it with there ex and she would always persistently say to me, I would never do that to you because It's so wrong and I care about you too much.

Anyway she's basically started dating this guy and as I'm still healing It's so hard to get over it. I see them everyday in college together acting like nothing happened. I know my ex really loved me but I can't see how she's acting like I was never in her life and that she's ready to just jump the gun. She also tried to text me saying she doesn't hate me but that she's told everyone she hates me alot but that she's in love with this new guy after only three weeks!

I know it's easier said that done because once you split up with your ex you never really have to see them again but I have to put up with her and this guy on a daily basis. I don't want her back I want to clarify that. I just feel as if though everything's hard for me at the minute but she's finding everything easy and she's extremely happy. She keeps claiming It's the happiest she's ever been which in way she's trying to say being with me was the worst shes ever been but throughout our honey moon period of our relationship was the exact same as what she's having now.

The guy is the complete opposite to me in every way. I can't help to think if she's trying to get into some sort of rebound relationship or whether she's needing the comfort for the pain she's going through to distract her from getting over it by being with somebody else. All of her friends are jumping on the band wagon like "you guys are so cute" and "you look great together" and it's just annoying to hear because this is my first every breakup. I don't know how to deal with things and it breaks my heart to see somebody i was with happy with somebody else whilst I'm here upset and hurting.

Any advice at all would be appreciated. Just be straight up, thankyou.

[Clinton]

If she has decided to be with your friend, then she isn't worth your love. The fact is that, if she has chosen someone else it would have been okay, she deciding to date someone so close to you makes her a betrayer. I strongly advice you you move on and date other girls.

Good luck!

[Sammy]

Your question is one that has been faced by many others, including me. We fall for a girl who just isn't as into us. What's unfortunate is that we are so brainwashed into thinking that men know all of the answers to these questions to the point where it is almost embarrassing to ask. As men, this messes with our minds when we have moments where we have a hard time dealing with emotions, especially when girls are involved. Asking your buddies "how do I get over my ex girlfriend" is sometimes hard for a man for a few reasons:

• Guys aren't overly sensitive to other guys and don't provide other men with the close-nit support that girls receive from their friends post-breakup.
• Guys are supposed to make things work. Including relationships. Any failure is an "x" mark on his personality.
• Guys generally deal with their emotions internally verses externally. This can lead to built up frustration and anger that isn't noticeable to the outside world.

And since you were courageous enough to reach out for advice, I'm going to help you and the rest of my readers with this question by sharing three key tips to get you rolling in the right direction again.

Tip #1: Think Realistically

The downside of being in love is that you begin to think irrationally. You start to believe in destiny, soulmates, and more. While this is great to think about while in a relationship, it isn't a realistic mindset once you end the relationship. The truth is, if the girl breaks up with you, there will always be someone in this world who was and is a better fit for you. Instead of idealizing your ex girlfriend, start to think about the negatives in your ex as well as what improvements you would like to see in your next girlfriend. Was your ex not supportive of you? Was your ex controlling? Look to find someone who doesn't exhibit these characteristics.

Tip #2: Start Dating!

This may seem like a hard recommendation to some, but it might be the most vital of these three recommendations. If you are single, you will need to fill this void in some way. Dating others is a great way to start. Go out to social events (parties, bars, sports events, etc.) and talk to girls. If this isn't your style, try online dating. However you do it, set up dates. It doesn't have to be anything serious, but you need to be in the presence of other girls to help you forget about your ex girlfriend.

Tip #3: Enjoy Being Single

Think of your single time as an advantage rather than a disadvantage. Now is the time for you to focus on yourself and do things that you've always wanted to do. Focus on travel, school, exercise, activities and simply spending quality time with those you enjoy being with. If you are able to enjoy your life by yourself, it won't be long before girls begin to notice and become attracted to you.

Getting over your ex girlfriend will be rough. This will especially be rough if you were thinking about marriage. However, follow the three steps above to begin your process of moving on from the girl who broke your heart.