I drove him away

[Deltacobell]

so I’ve been seeing this guys for 6 years. He was always with other girls and on and off with me and other girlfriends and never gave me much attention once I started to get into him for about the first 5.5 years. Then this year he changed. He took me everywhere wanted a future with me and was always there for me and committed. A lot of times we’d break up bc we’d get into a fight and I’d go crazy texting him a million times showing up at his work and stuff and we wouldn’t talk for weeks and month so but he’d come back. Anyways he was treating me really good but I wasn’t having a lot of time for him and he got upset and I went crazy and he dumped me so I begged for him back not too much tho and he took me back. Then a couple days later I he was the one being distant so I went crazy on him again and he hasn’t talked to me since. So he told me he wanted space and I said I’d make it up to him and I got him a box with like football tickets and a bunch of cute little things and he completely shut me down and wouldn’t give me closure and I blew up his phone once again for days and he cussed me out and blocked me on everything. How do I fix this? We altogether haven’t been together for like 2 months now.

[Julia]

When he says he's not happy and wants space what he's really telling you is that he's not happy being with you and that he needs some distance from you. It stings when you hear this. In many cases, the woman won't even be expecting to hear anything remotely close to this. In her mind, things were going well and she was completely and totally focused on the future. That's likely exactly what you're feeling too. It's easy to get caught up in feeling sorry for yourself. You need to push that aside though so you can focus on your plan to keep him and rebuild the flailing relationship.

Arguing with him when your boyfriend says he's not happy and needs some time will only serve to make him feel more justified in his decision. Conflict may very well be at the root of the problems you two face. If you try and fight him over his decision to leave you, he'll likely cut off contact for good and then your chances of being with him again will be lost. Instead, you have to find the inner strength to accept that he's unhappy and you have to let him go, at least for the short term.

By giving him the space he desires you're showing him that you're emotionally mature. You're also ensuring he sees that his needs come before your own. What most women don't see when they're in the middle of a situation like this is that their boyfriend believes he knows what his life will be like once the break up has happened. To him there's the promise of fun filled evenings and no conflict once he's single. The reality of that is actually quite different. He'll quickly realize just how much he misses you. If you can take a step back and give him want he wants, he'll soon see that what he actually wants isn't space or time, it's you.

[Deltacobell]

THank u! So space isn’t what he wanted initially. He said he only told me that so I would stop blowing up his phone bc I was being so annoying about it and he couldn’t think of anything else to get me to stop. Shortly before he would talk about how much he missed and loved me and how he wishes I was making more time for him. So I tried to but then a couple days later I blew up on him again and that’s when this whole thing happened. He’s so mad right now and even tho I treated him good I feel like all I can remember is the negative things I did but he did always used to tell me how like he’s never had anyone as good to him as I was or loyal and things like that. But I still. Now that there are other things that he wasn’t getting from me that I didn’t realize until now and tried explaining to him that we could change and work on. But honestly he was so mad he didn’t want to hear it . Do u think he’ll really come back again if I just leave him alone for a month or two?

[Sammy]

Break up is hard to go through, so if you really want back your boyfriend, prepare yourself for rejection at first. But still don't worry; it is possible to get him back for good. Start by knowing the reason why you got separated from him. Whose fault was it? Bear in mind that you want to get back your boyfriend, therefore you'll have to take the first step. Phone him and ask for forgiveness, also ask him to be friends again and forget the past.

Though it is not easy to wash out the past, but you can help him. Phone him quite often to ask about his health, what going on in his life without interfering much. Turn out to be his best friend around and take this opportunity to rebuild the trust which you had ruined. Indeed this going to take some time, but once you has succeeded it will be to your advantage. One trick that you can use is to make him jealous, of course don't go out with some else, but you can make new friends. Go out with your old friends and invite him also. Be attractive, get back to the gym and get yourself back in shape. Looks always works, it is one factor which will definitely get back your boyfriend.

Getting back your boyfriend is not that easy, but not impossible also. Still you should be very confident in any step that you are undertaking. Don't be in a rush and end up doing a mistake that will make you lose him forever. So, be patient and seize the right time and play your cards.

[Sammy]

I didn’t really do him wrong. I became a little busy but I was doing things I couldn’t avoid and trying to work on myself and he couldn’t understand that. But I was doing it for us. If I’m being honest I could’ve made a little more time than I was letting on and I know there’s other things I could’ve done better for sure. But he wants absolutely nothing to do with me right now. He blocked me so I’d stop calling him, so I don’t think checking up and being friends is going to work at all. But do u think the whole bettering myself and my looks would work?

The only thing that will work now is to give him space. The fact is that the more you try to convince him to come back, the more he pulls further away from you. So, just give him space for at least 30 days, then try to re-establish contact again. This will give him time to miss you, and eventually want you back.

[Deltacobell]

I bought him football tickets and the game isn't until November 12. Should I text him the day before that? Or not at all? I told him he could keep them. I was planning on texting him the day before and apologizing for the way I was acting and telling him to have fun at the game.