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How Do I Look Manly When Growing Bald

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MillionaireMatch

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  • How Do I Look Manly When Growing Bald

    Hi everyone,

    I need your advice on this issue:

    How do I look manly when growing bald?

    Thanks for any advice.

  • #2
    First off, I want to say that I COMPLETELY understand where you’re coming from. See, I started going bald when I was about 22 years old and it filled me with so much anxiety and shame I basically became TERRIFIED of talking to women, never mind actually FLIRTING with them for YEARS.

    It was AWFUL. Every single morning I woke up, took a shower, and then spent depressing minutes running a comb through my thin, thin, thin hair and staring at the horizon of my scalp with a burning self-loathing that made my genitals want to retire from the game of love forever.

    Then, one day, I was drunkenly hanging with my buddy Zach when he said “We should shave your head.”

    And, like I said, I was DRUNK so instead of saying “NO! BUT THEN I’LL BE A BALD GUY AT 22! AHH!” I said “Um . . . shuuuure . . .”

    And we got out the clippers and took HILARIOUS pictures of me being shorn like some kind of man-shaped sheep. (Not to mention messing up and accidentally lacerating the skull ridges above my ears so blood flowed pure and red like I was in the movie “Carrie” or something . . .

    Anyway, the actual SHAVING of my head was delightfully silly and possibly dangerous (you know, using SHARP things while drunk and all that) . . .

    But it turned out to be the BEST DECISION I EVER MADE (besides marrying my amazing wife, that is. Oh, and buying this crazy reclining desk I have. I’m totally laying down while I write this with a monitor hovering 2 feet over my head. It’s awesome.)

    ANYWAY the reason shaving my head was such a GOOD DECISION was because it PUT ME IN CONTROL and allowed me to OWN MY SHAME.

    See, before I shaved my head I was a “balding” guy in his early twenties — I was DESPERATELY trying to “turn back the clock” on my scalp to the days when my hair was so thick and luxurious they had to actually PIN my High School graduation cap to my head because the HAIR HELMET I had wouldn’t allow it to stay on in any other way.

    (Seriously, all my years growing up my Mom would say “Michael, your hair is so thick you’ll NEVER have to worry about going bald.” THANKS MOM!)

    And I’ll tell you right now, DESPERATELY trying to fight a losing battle? Not manly. Not sexy. Not worth it.

    The moment I SHAVED my head I went from being a “balding guy pitifully trying to hang on to my rapidly-fleeing hair” to a BALD GUY who MADE A CHOICE and TOOK CONTROL and EMBRACED my baldness.

    And I have to tell you, the SHIFT both internally (I was no longer “worried” if women could see my scalp because I KNEW they could see my scalp because I was BALD) and externally (making the CHOICE to shave my head and truly BE bald made me come across as CONFIDENT in a way I never had before) was ASTONISHING and completely changed the way I interacted with women forever.

    SO, Jim, how do YOU keep your MANLINESS as your follicles fall like autumn leaves?

    By ACCEPTING and EMBRACING and OWNING your baldness.

    No moping around complaining about your hair going away . . .

    No joining the “hair club for men.”

    Nope.

    OWN it. SHAVE YOUR HEAD NOW when it’s still a “choice” (because making a choice is sexy) instead of holding on like some kid who doesn’t want to give up his GI Joe’s . . .

    And you know what? This same idea of OWNING who you are and what you are and the things you are ASHAMED of applies to pretty much EVERYTHING in your life and especially in your dating life . . .

    If you ACT ashamed and embarrassed by something you see as “bad” in your life or in who you are, other people will react to that by reinforcing your negative self image (and by unconsciously reacting to your EXPECTATION that they will be turned off by your baldness) . . .

    But if you TAKE CONTROL of the issue and OWN it people will see you as CONFIDENT and POWERFUL and SEXY . . .

    And, like I said, this doesn’t just apply to your hair, it applies to EVERYTHING . . .

    FOR INSTANCE . . .

    I get a lot of questions from folks asking [B][COLOR=#B22222]“Mike, how do I tell somebody I’m dating that I have a sexually transmitted infection?”[/COLOR][/B]

    And the answer is: “With confidence and without shame.”

    I mean, the fact is a LOT of people out there have STI’s (and not just people who are sexually promiscuous) . . .

    If you try to HIDE the fact that you have an STI and make it a REALLY BIG DEAL then folks are going to run screaming from you when you tell them because your SHAME will tell them that this is something HORRIFYING (while in reality most STI’s are quite manageable and safer sex techniques radically reduce the chance of transmission.)

    But if you un-emotionally and matter-of-factly say “So, just so you know, I have a common STI. It’s under control and I haven’t had an outbreak in about 2 years but I wanted to make sure you knew before things got intimate.”

    No “apologizing” or “freaking out.” Just put it out there on the table with confidence and a matter-of-fact attitude . . .

    Same thing for things like mental illness (bi-polar, ADHD, whatever); having some kind of debilitating disease (Parkinsons, Lyme, whatever); being significantly overweight; being stuck in a wheelchair WHATEVER . . .

    Whatever it is that you’re ASHAMED of and think people are going to be FREAKED OUT and DISGUSTED BY . . .

    Well, if YOU act like they SHOULD be disgusted and freaked out they WILL BE.

    (If I walked around wearing some STUPID wig all the time folks would think I was SUPER ASHAMED of being bald and that SHAME would turn folks off WAY more than my actual baldness ever could.)

    But if you OWN IT and ACCEPT IT and TALK ABOUT IT LIKE IT’S NOT A BIG DEAL . . .

    Well, then it’s actually not that big of a deal.

    Got it?

    So shave your head.

    Oh, and buy some hats because it’s COLD being bald.

    Comment


    • #3
      Clay, that was a good advice, thank you.

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