Tweet
"Yeah, well...my mommy told me I should do [insert something preposterous and/or pathetic here] and girls will like me more. But I did that, and it sorta didn't work."
In the brackets you could freely insert anything and everything from "wear a tie to coffee meetings" to "comb my hair like a choirboy" to "bring flowers and candy on first dates".
Has your mom ever attempted to give you some advice regarding women in the past--either solicited or otherwise?
She may have suggested using certain smiley pics that you look "sweet" in with your online profile.
Perhaps she told you that your table manners were the most important thing to get right on a first date.
Maybe she could have told you what to say, since...hey...that's exactly what your father told her in 1972.
And then there's the most disastrous angle of them all: when she starts telling you "what women want".
Look, why beat around the bush? I'm just going to tell it to you straight: The very last person on Earth you should be taking dating and/or relationship advice from is your mom.
(OK, maybe the last person on Earth is either Charlie Manson or a Kardashian...but you get my point.)
I mean, I get it. It's altogether possible that your mom and dad have been happily married for years. They might even be a great example of how to run a solid relationship.
It's not that she doesn't mean well. She most definitely does.
And hey, it's not like your table manners don't matter at all.
It's just that she can't help but have motherly affinity towards you, and she can't see it any other way. So essentially, she's giving you advice on how to help other women adore you the way SHE does.
Therefore, the danger there is that if you do what she suggests in an effort to earn female favor, the women you meet will also tend to have motherly affinity toward you...at best.
At worst, you'll come off like a "mama's boy"...especially if you're unwise enough to actually talk to women about what your mother suggested doing to "impress" them.
Believe me when I tell you that talking about your mother with women calls to mind "nurturing" you rather than being naughty with you.
Ouch. That hurts.
And I haven't even covered the part yet about how your mom is never going to tell you anything that would ever "hurt your feelings". To hear her tell it, you have no "hidden detractors"...even if you haven't been on a second date in over a decade.
What can she say? She's biased. She already loves you. In her mind any and every other woman on Earth shouldn't need any convincing whatsoever to feel the same way.
The problem is that those other women don't know you yet. So you've still got to meet them and start from "square one".
And they certainly don't have a preconceived notion that you're wonderful (well, unless you're really, really good at building social proof out of thin air).
Remember Forrest Gump? Wasn't he the one who always rambled on about what his "mama always said"?
Suffice it to say that:
1) NO woman can take on both a "mommy" role and a "lover" role in your life. It's one or the other.
2) Women are repulsed by and flat-out run away from "mama's boys" like the plague. It comes off as if your mommy still has influence over you in all sorts of ways--which doesn't give the impression that you're a leader, provider OR a protector. (I mean, it's hard to do that if you're basically still breastfeeding, right?)
3) Forrest Gump didn't exactly pull women like James Bond, did he?
And if Forrest Gump wasn't bad enough, consider Norman Bates. That's one hell of an unsavory thought.
So let's get real here. Do you want women to "mother" you, or "smother" you with ravishing outbursts of spontaneous sexuality?
The choice is yours. But I'd highly recommend not falling into the trap of thinking your mom's suggestions on how to intrigue and attract women are going to ever get you the desired results.
It's great to love and respect your mom. Heck, once you get drafted into the NBA like Kevin Durant buy her a new house and some "bling". Give her a big, sloppy kiss on the cheek at halftime, call her every Sunday and tell her she's the "real MVP".
Just keep her the heck out of your dating life.
Do you agree? Share your thoughts in the comments below!